Excuse Me, Teacher

I love English, but I love this more...

2009-09-25T13:42:00.004-04:00

Today is Friday, and only one thing is more awesome than Friday at my job. The only thing more awesome than Friday is seeing a former student being successful at something new, especially a student you knew pretty well.

In the spring, I taught a class that was full of bright students. One of the brightest and hardest-working was a young woman from a Middle Eastern country. She was about my age, had moved to the US with her husband to study, and was a bottomless pit of questions about English. She was taking some continuing education classes at the university in addition to her English classes, and I helped her with her essays. At the end of the semester, she threw a party for her female teachers and classmates (at which I felt horribly under-dressed when I discovered that women who wear scarves and veils in public look like supermodels at home). She cooked for a solid day ahead of time and made everyone feel welcome and at home in her apartment. In short, she was an amazing student.

And then her father got sick at home. She had to leave in a hurry, just a few weeks before the end of the semester. And that was the last I heard from her.

Until today! I came back from lunch and she was standing in the hallway, apparently waiting around to see me. She had had a difficult summer at home, as her father had passed away. But she was back and studying full-time at the community college, in classes every day with native English speakers. She brought me a teeny bottle of perfume from her country and invited me to another end-of-semester party in December sometime. We hugged and she promised to come back and visit again.

And that is why I have this job. I love the English language, but more than that, I love my students. And I love reconnecting with the best ones most of all.

Category 3, Round 2

2009-09-21T14:52:00.002-04:00

Yeah, one of my category 3 students came back for round two of why he should be moved up. Because apparently talking to my boss didn't convince him that moving was out of the question. Now he hates me and thinks he's not moving because I want to make him miserable, not because my professional judgment and the fact that the TWO classes above him are full make moving impossible. Awesome.

So I had the conversation with the category 3 students...

2009-09-21T12:53:00.002-04:00

... and it went exactly the way I expected. I even added that there is absolutely no room for more students in the level above mine, so even if I wanted to move them, I couldn't. I still got the stink-eye. I referred them to my boss, who is going to tell them exactly the same thing. No means no, people!

Students on the move

2009-09-18T09:56:00.003-04:00

Okay, so it's obviously been a million years since the last time I posted. But I figured it would be good to start this back up, since the fall semester has begun at my language school. Today is the end of the first full week of class, and I can say with some certainty that I have had more students moving in and out of my classes this week than any semester ever. In my experience, students who move from class to class generally fall into the following categories:

1. Registered late. This is the easiest group to deal with. They just got here late, so they show up to class halfway through the week. They don't want anything in particular; they're just late.

2. Wants to move up and should. This group was having a bad day when they took the placement test last week. They were tired, culture shocked, hungry, hung over, whatever. They would do much better in a higher class, so they need to be moved.

3. Wants to move up and shouldn't. This group has a pretty high estimation of their language abilities. They know they know more than they appear to. They're smarter than their friend who is in a higher class. They can't understand why you doesn't agree, and will let you know how wrong you are until you either give in or show them their diagnostic test score of 17%.

4. Needs to move down. This student is a fantastic guesser and somehow placed into an advanced class when they're still struggling to master the present tense. You can tell who they are by the deer-in-headlights look they give you when you ask them a question. So you have to have the awkward moving-down conversation with them, using mostly hand gestures: "Here's your test. You don't know present tense (pointing at wrong answers, shaking head). You should move down (pointing down)." And then you wait for them to say, "No, teacher! I understand! I don't move down!"

5. Can't make up their mind. They want more writing practice. Or do they? They're in your class the first day, but then they decide another class at the same time would be better. So then they're gone, until they realize how much homework the other teacher gives. Then they're back, looking sheepish.

Of course, not all moving students fit these stereotypes, and I exaggerate a little bit. But not much. I've quit reprinting my attendance sheet every time a student adds or drops my class until next week when everything is settled, because I've had to recycle at least two trees' worth of outdated attendance sheets in the last four days. We have a meeting this afternoon to discuss all the moving students, so everyone should be in a permanent spot by Monday. At which point I have to have the discussion with the category 3 students about how nobody except them wants them to move up. And then deal with the stink-eye from them for the rest of the semester. Awesome.

Language lessons

2009-03-26T14:20:00.002-04:00

I decided last week that it would be fun to learn some basic phrases in all of my students' languages. My students get a giant kick out of listening to me butcher their mother tongues, which for me is the whole point of doing it - they enjoy being the teacher for a few minutes everyday. The hard part is that among my 30ish students, there are eight languages to account for. I do pretty well with Spanish, French, and Portuguese, and am not half bad at Japanese, but Arabic, Chinese, Korean, and Sinhalese are hard. The Arabic-speaking men in my classes are the best cheerleaders; they try to think of mnemonic devices to help me and nod encouragingly as I try to cough and wheeze my way through some of the more difficult sounds. So far, this is what I have learned to say - good morning, goodbye, and thank you in eight languages:

Spanish: buenos dias, adios, gracias (I minored in Spanish, so this was a freebie.)

French: bonjour, au revoir, merci

Portuguese: bon dia, chau, obrigado

Japanese: ohayou, sayonara, arigato

Arabic: sabah al kheer, ma'a salama, shokran (one of my students said to think of "sugar" + "ran")

Chinese: zao shang, zai jian, xie xie (the intonation is the hardest part)

Korean: an-yong, an-yong (with different intonation), kam-sa-ham-ni-da

Sinhalese: suba udesanak, tata, stuti

Aren't I accomplished? Eight languages! Now if only I could remember all of them all the time...

Midterm

2009-03-13T21:37:00.003-04:00

So we have officially reached the midpoint of the semester, and everything is chugging along. I gave out midterm grade reports at the end of last week, and was pretty surprised when all the failing students accepted their grades gracefully. I usually have at least one freak-out, so it was nice to not have to deal with that. The freaking out actually came from the A students, many of whom wanted to know why they had a 96 instead of 100. "Teacher, WHY?" Perfectionists.

So after that, I needed a vacation. Enter spring break! Perfectly timed to come after midterms. Cary and I had a house blessing and housewarming party the first Saturday of the break, which went really well, but had me cleaning like I have never cleaned before all week. I dusted furniture crevices that will never be seen by anyone. My mom was really proud when she got here the day of the party to help set up. The clean gene is totally dominant in her, but not in me at all. I am just like my dad - where I drop something when I come in the door is generally where it belongs. I've gotten tidier since I got married, because Cary is very organized and clutter stresses him out, but this degree of cleaning was a real stretch for me. And in the end, the house looked beautiful and the party was a success. Who knows? It's taken me almost 25 years to get this organized, so maybe by the time I'm 50, I'll have some semblance of organization on a day-to-day basis.

After the party, I headed down to my hometown to help Suzanne do wedding stuff for the first half of the week. Really, she didn't need much help, as she is totally full-steam-ahead with the wedding planning, but I enjoyed giving it anyway. I went dress-shopping with her and Mama, and she found a really beautiful dress. She looked great in everything, but the dress she found was truly stunning on her. I wish I could post a picture, but sadly, I can't. I can post a picture of my bridesmaid's dress, though. I am thrilled that it's not super bridesmaid-y.

See? Very glamorous, and not something that I will cringe at when I look at pictures 10 years from now. I also got to help taste-test wedding cake - obviously a crucial job for the matron of honor. Other than that, I had a restful half-week at my parents' house, while Suzanne and Mike and my mom ran around meeting photographers, videographers, etc. How nice it is now to help with wedding stuff and not be the bride!

I came back home on Wednesday and have been relaxing ever since. I had lunch with Cary at work yesterday, and checked out five books from the library, which I've read two of already. Tomorrow Cary and I are having a date day, which I'm really looking forward to. So overall, a lovely spring break! I love my job, but sometimes I wish I were independently wealthy so I could just do fun stuff all the time. But I imagine it would get old.

What Emily Needs

2009-02-24T17:23:00.003-05:00

I saw this on Facebook. I typed in "emily needs" on google and I'm writing down the top 10 things it came up with. I'm posting it here instead of Facebook so I don't annoy people with the tagging.

1. Emily needs to give Tim food in Social Studies today. Ummm... right.

2. Emily needs new painting skills. Or any painting skills.

3. Emily needs your phone numbers. This is not working out too well so far.

4. Emily needs to get her Tortillas on Vimeo. I'm about to give up on this list.

5. Emily needs advice. Okay, that's more like it. I generally could use some advice.

6. Emily needs help deciding how to cut her hair. No, I like my hair the way it is!

7. Emily needs more light on her face. An ad for Flickr, but a little more light couldn't hurt.

8. Emily needs a job. I have a job. I just need benefits.

9. Emily needs an iTunes gift card. Ain't that the truth.

10. Emily needs lifelong support. Yes! This is one that google finally got right! I do need and want lifelong support... although not in the sense google was talking about, like being on a ventilator.

How right was I...

2009-02-19T10:09:00.000-05:00

... about Ajira Airways yesterday! I freaking love Lost.

Update on Non-Teaching Activities

2009-02-18T14:25:00.002-05:00

Mostly what I write about on here is teaching and what that's like, but I thought it might be nice to do a quick update on the rest of my life. So here it is, in list form (because apparently lists are how I process information... who would have thunk it from a such a normally disorganized person?):

1. Cary and I are pretty well settled into our new house, which we bought in November. Most of our pictures are hung, and my mom sent us her piano (so she can turn her formal living room into a library... I want a library). We are trying to phase out our TJ Maxx art and buy real art from our friends or from the art festivals here in town. We're also gearing up for our house blessing/warming next month.

2. Atticus is growing by leaps and bounds. He is almost four months old now, and weighs five pounds. The vet says he was not properly socialized, since he was separated from his brothers and sisters so young. So basically, we have a socially awkward cat who bonds with us by mauling us. We are working hard on fixing this... and by "we," I mean Cary and me, not Atticus.

We are also getting neutered in a few weeks... and this time by "we," I mean Atticus, not Cary and me.

3. George is keeping up the hardcore hatred of Atticus. Poor guy. All he wants is some peace and quiet with Cary and me, and what he gets instead is a kitten half his size pouncing on his head. He has gone from a genial, good-natured fella to a perpetual sourpuss. He's happiest at night, when Atticus is sleeping in the laundry room.

4. I haven't had any real matron of honor duties yet for Suzanne's wedding, but she is going full steam ahead with the planning. The wedding is December 19, and she already has the church, the bishop who is going to marry them (a friend of the family), a reception hall, and a caterer. They started registering last weekend. I'm going down to Palm Bay for a few days over spring break to help shop for a dress - yay!

5. I'm in a really great Bible study at church. It's a study by Beth Moore, who is this dynamo Bible study writer out of Texas. There's a video component to the study, and I guessed that she was from Texas based solely on her hairdo in the video. Every week her hairdo gets bigger. But the study is really good, and I'm getting a lot out of it, despite the giant hair distraction.

6. My obsession with Lost gets bigger every week too. I'm really glad Cary's watching it, or I would explode with commentary at the end of every episode. My officemate Daryl watches it too, so we can discuss on Thursday mornings. Biggest questions right now: are the Oceanic Six coming back to the Island via Ajira Airways? Is Miles the Dharma video guy's baby? Is Locke really dead? Is Desmond coming back to the Island too (with Penny)? Is Sawyer going to be shirtless again? (Just kidding... but really, is he?)

So that's the rest of my life right now... nothing too exciting, but I'm enjoying it.

Happy Valentine

2009-02-13T10:38:00.003-05:00

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day, so today I am celebrating with my students. I brought in those cheap Valentine cards and candy that elementary school kids give out. The ones I got are dog-themed and have pictures of dogs saying things like, "I'm yours fur-ever," and "You're the pick of the litter, Valentine!" I figured my students never got to have elementary school Valentine's Day, so I'm giving them all the cards and candy.

One class down, two to go. In my first class, I was giving a quiz, so I gave them the candy first so they wouldn't hate me so much. And then one of them wrote the cutest thing ever at the bottom of her quiz:

Dear Emily (decorated with hearts and smiley faces)

HAPPY VALENTINE (more hearts)

Thank you always. (flower)

I love you and your class.

I heart you (flower, and she actually spelled out "heart")

I heart her too! See, this is why I teach. Because sometimes the students are mind-blowingly awesome.

I also got candy from another student, which was really sweet. I might get more before the end of the day, because international students, especially those from eastern Asia, are often big gift-givers. It's a nice perk of this job. But the "I heart you" totally made my day.

I Have Found My People!

2009-02-10T22:30:00.003-05:00

They are posting pictures at www.englishfailblog.com. This website documents real-world occurrences of grammatical horror. Like the sign that advertised for a "GROJ SALE." Sound it out... that's right, it's "garage sale." It bewilders and frightens me that there are people this dumb in the world.

Now, granted, a lot of the pictures are from Chinese restaurants and other places with non-English-speaking proprietors, or are poor translations from other languages on commercial products. I am not offended by them, because not speaking English well is a pretty decent excuse for not knowing how to spell and punctuate things. These are not the people I think are dumb. I work with these people every day, and they are smart, smart, smart. The dumb people I'm referring to are native English people who spell garage GROJ. WTF, English speakers? Let's step up our game a little and at least try to spell and punctuate words correctly.

So, my fellow photo submitters at the English Fail Blog are truly my people. Nothing feeds my inner snob more than working up a righteous outrage at bad spelling and punctuation, and apparently there are others who feel the same way. My people.

Told You So

2009-02-06T10:32:00.002-05:00

I did a peer review activity with my beginning reading/writing class today, wherein they were supposed to read each other's paragraphs about a famous landmark in their country and offer advice on how to improve. I gave them very specific questions to ask about the paragraphs, so they wouldn't get confused. Most of them finished earlier than I expected and then just sat around looking sleepy, but two of them, a Asian woman and a Middle-Eastern man, got into a hardcore grammar/spelling debate. It was awesome. It went kind of like this:

Asian woman: No, you can say, "There are a lot of buildings in there." You remember "there? Say "in there."

Middle-Eastern man: No, I think just "there."

Asian woman: No, is "in there." I know.

Middle-Eastern man (conceding to the better student): Okay.

Me: Actually, he's right. It's just "there."

Asian woman: Ohhhh...

Middle-Eastern man: What I say?!? Ha!

And later...

Middle-Eastern man: Teacher! Look. I write new sentence on new line (points) or same line?

Asian woman: Same line!

Me: She's right. Same line.

Asian woman: I win!

Middle-Eastern man: Curses! Foiled again! (Not really - he said something like "Aargh!")

It cracked me up that they were so into the activity, and obviously having a good time being competitive about it. That's one of my favorite things about my job: getting to see students from totally different backgrounds helping each other learn. I love being a teacher!

List-O-Rama

2009-02-04T15:18:00.003-05:00

Wow, I either need to start updating more frequently or cancel the blog altogether. It's seriously been two weeks since I updated? Wow. I find I process my teaching experience best in lists, like "10 Awesome Things about My Students," "Five Things I Wish My Students Would Stop Doing," etc. So maybe I'll update in that format from now on, and it will make updating more frequently easier. It's weird that lists work for me so well - I'm really not an innately organized person at all. Maybe that's why I like lists - they make me be organized, which is something I need to be if I'm going to be a good teacher. So, here are some lists:

Five Hard Things About Teaching Beginners

1. I. Have. To. Talk. Like. This. And some of them still don't understand.

2. When my elementary vocabulary is exhausted and I am totally out of words to explain what I mean, some of them are still confused.

3. I have to repeat myself at least twice for every activity.

4. They are addicted to their dictionaries and/or pocket electronic translators. I secretly fantasize about smashing electronic dictionaries with a giant sledgehammer.

5. It's really hard to explain grammar to someone who isn't really sure what a noun is.

Five Awesome Things About Teaching Beginners

1. When they finally get something, the rewarding feeling is HUGE.

2. It's amazing to see how much they can communicate with so few words.

3. They ask really good, basic questions that make me think about English. Like yesterday, we learned a new word and one of them said, "Teacher, is it noun or verb?" I said, "Both," and he said, "BOTH?!? How I know?!?" That's a really good question that's really hard to answer!

4. They generally work really hard because they want so much to get better.

5. On the whole, they're just adorable :)

Five Hard Things About Teaching Advanced Students

1. They ask really hard questions, and they know if my answer is BS.

2. Sometimes they know more English grammar rules than I do.

3. They can be perfectionists. Like, they speak great English, but because they don't sound like Kevin Costner, they think their English is bad.

4. Sometimes they're not interested in knowing something unless it's going to be on the TOEFL.

5. I have to plan more for them to do, because they finish everything faster.

Five Awesome Things About Teaching Advanced Students

1. They understand almost everything I say, so we can joke around a lot more and I don't have to talk so slowly.

2. They ask really hard questions, which sharpens my meta-linguistic awareness.

3. I get to geek out on them, because I'm teaching them aspects of English grammar and communication that my beginners aren't ready for. Like the passive causative construction, which is what we worked on in my advanced grammar class today.

4. We can do fun things like watch "The Office" for cultural awareness lessons because they can actually understand most of it.

5. I get to be a little more of a friend and a little less of a mom than I do with my beginners, because they don't need as much help.

This semester, I am teaching a beginning reading/writing, an advanced grammar, and an uber-advanced listening/speaking class. Before now, I've mostly worked with intermediate students, so this is a good stretch for my teaching abilities. I'm really enjoying myself, and am frankly a little impressed that I'm able to communicate reasonably well with both groups. Plus, I just love my students. I hardly ever have students I don't like, but I'm continually struck by how cool they all are. I'll leave you with a sample of their coolness.

In reading/writing this morning. Working on using prepositions.

Me: So, how do we fill in this blank? We want to say, "Walk ___ the church. Walk..."

Student 1: ON the church!

Me (smiling): No, walk ON the church would look like this. (Draws picture on board of stick figure on church roof.)

Class: (Cracks up)

Student 1 (laughing): Oops.

Student 2: Spider-Man!

Debriefing

2009-01-16T19:46:00.003-05:00

So now I'm at the end of the first week of classes, and I have some time to catch my breath. The first week went pretty well. Points of interest:

1. My reading/writing class is really low. Like, I'm having to define words like "process" and "war" for them. Their listening and speaking abilities are really low too. I have to talk... like... this. After class today, I went back to my office and started explaining to my office mate about the space heater I brought in... and I talked... super... slow... until I realized he spoke English.

2. My reading/writing textbook is organized weirdly. Instead of focus on one reading strategy at a time, it focuses on like, six. I'm not sure I like this.

3. Holy level-changing students, Batman! We sometimes have to move students around after class starts, if it's apparent that they would be better suited to a higher or lower level class. I usually have one or two. But this semester, I had two move up out of my class, one move up into my class, and two move down into my class. Combine that with the fact that half the class can't seem to make it to school at 8:30, and I have a class I feel like I barely know.

4. My advanced academic spoken English class is all men. Six guys, four from the Middle East. I always wonder with Middle Eastern men think about being taught by a woman - I know in many countries, men and women go to separate schools. I was a little intimidated at first, but they all seem laid-back and ready to learn. It's a little strange being the only girl in the room though - even my language assistant is a guy. But on the other hand, I always have the women's room to myself.

5. We had a bunch of students register late, so I get to add another class starting next week, which brings me up to... full-time hours!

So all in all, things are pretty good. Tomorrow morning I'm interviewing for a full-time lecturer position at the ELI. I know whatever is supposed to work out will work out, but I'm still a little nervous - I didn't really have to have a formal interview for the job I have now - I got a teaching assistantship and then stayed on after graduation. So that said, I need to go practice my presentation. Good stuff.

Back-to-school

2009-01-09T22:34:00.005-05:00

This week was the first week of classes for the spring, which is always interesting and challenging in an up-in-the-air kind of way. In the department in which I work, we teach only international students, and there is a lot of turnover from semester to semester. Every semester we have a lot of returning students, but also a lot of students who are brand new to the US. Because we can't be sure of whose visa will get approved, who will actually come up with the money to travel, etc., we can't be sure of who's going to be here until they're here the first week of class. That means that it's impossible to know how many classes are needed or who will teach what until all the students have been processed and placement-tested. We spend the first part of the first week of class doing that, and then we start classes a few days after the rest of the university. It's really the only way this can be done, but is a little stressful for me as a teacher because I don't find out what I'm teaching, or how much, until the day before.

This semester there was some added stress because I quit at the community college, for various reasons. Partly it's because I'm hoping to get a full-time position (with benefits) at the university starting in the second half of the semester, so I couldn't commit to a full term at the community college in case I had to leave in the middle. But even if I don't get the full-time position, I've been wanting to have full-time hours at the university - teaching international students is really my passion, and I can do that better at the university. Without the guarantee of half my income coming from the community college, however, things got a little stressful for me this week while I waited to see if I would have full-time work this semester or not. Yesterday I thought I was only going to have half-time work, which led to some fun panicky emails to check on potential tutoring jobs, but today everything worked out because I was asked to help develop and concurrently teach a spoken English class in a related department to my department. This adds a quarter time to my teaching appointment, and I will try to add another class in Spring B to bring me up to full-time again. I'm really excited about the course-development thing. It will definitely be a challenge, but I think it will be fun. The class will be small, and I know at least one of the students. I'll be in the department where I first fell in love with ESL instruction, and I think I might have an undergraduate assistant. All in all, it's going to be fantastic. I love the way God works things out.

Too cute

2009-01-05T09:29:00.002-05:00

I don't always enjoy reading the news. There's so much doom and gloom. But today, the BBC made me rethink my anti-news-reading position, by publishing the cutest news story ever:

Child elopers' Africa plan foiled

Apparently two German kids, ages six and seven, decided they wanted to elope to Africa, and got as far as their local train station before anyone noticed. They even brought along their maid of honor, the bride's five-year-old sister. According to the article, the police managed to convince them that without passports or money, it would be hard to get to Africa, but gave them a tour of the police station to make up for it. The police spokesman was even nice enough to say that maybe when they're older, they can try again. If that's not cute, I don't know what is. Here's to the power of love.

Happy New Year

2009-01-01T10:03:00.006-05:00

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

Finished grad school, went to Scotland and Wales, bought a house.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don't think I had any resolutions this year. I probably should make some for the coming year.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

A lot of people I know gave birth, and one of my close friends is scheduled for a c-section on January 5.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Thank God, no.

5. What countries did you visit?

The UK

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?

A full-time position at UF.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

November 17 we closed on our house. June 10-July 8 we were in Britain. July 1 was our 2nd anniversary.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Getting my master's.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Letting worrying about things take away some of the fun of life.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Not really. I had a stomach flu for a day over the summer, but I think that was it.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Our house!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

My husband is such a stand-up guy, and is always able to think of the right thing to do in sticky situations when I'm usually at a loss. On top of that, he's a really thoughtful person and always does things he knows I'll like. If that doesn't deserve celebration, I don't know what does.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I thought the way some people acted about the election was appalling and depressing. I knew a lot of people who were able to discuss the issues in a mature and dignified manner, but there seemed to be so many people who couldn't talk without calling names and basically being jerks.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Down payment on the house.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Our trip to Britain, buying the house, finishing grad school, my sister getting engaged.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?

Probably Salsa Celtica's "El Agua de la Vida." I listened to it a billion times and tried to find the band when we were in Edinburgh.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Happier.
b) thinner or fatter? About the same.
c) richer or poorer? Probably about the same. We have less cash in the bank, but now I have a job, so it kind of balances out.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Just relaxed and quit worrying so much.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Spent too much time in the editorial office trying to get my thesis through. I wish those people had been remotely cooperative so I could have not devoted hours and hours of my life trying to fill out paperwork the right way.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

With my family.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?

Stayed in love.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

The Office.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

No. Actually, there are some people that I like better this year than last year.

24. What was the best book you read?

Notes from a Small Island by Bill Bryson.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Salsa Celtica.

26. What did you want and get?

I got to stay in Gainesville, and I got to be comfortable with that decision.

27. What did you want and not get?

Nothing I want to discuss on this blog.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

I didn't go to the movies much this year. Probably the most fun I had in the theater was when I saw Sex and the City.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I rode the train from Edinburgh to York to Stalybridge, took a hike in the Pennines, and ate dinner at a pub with friends. I was 24.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Less fretting, more doing.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?

Whenever possible, be classy.

32. What kept you sane?

God, my husband.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

John Krasinski, Tim Tebow.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

No particular issue. Just wishing people would think for themselves.

35. Who did you miss?

I didn't get to see my traveling buddy much, so I missed her.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

Probably Gram and Hannah Alsobrook. They're way fun.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.

Cary says this all the time, from Fraggle Rock, of all places: "There are no rules. Those are the rules."

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

This is so corny, but I think about it a lot. From the soundtrack to "White Christmas:"

When I'm worried and I can't sleep

I count my blessings instead of sheep

And I fall asleep counting my blessings

Things I love

2008-12-29T23:09:00.002-05:00

I thought it would be nice to think about the small things I love in my life. Obviously I love God, my husband, my family and friends, etc., so I'm not including that kind of stuff on this list. Just the little things. I think if you can find happiness in little things, it goes a long way toward a happy life.

1. Living in our own house, which has a dishwasher, central air and heat, and a garbage disposal.

2. Queen. I got their greatest hits for Christmas, and Freddie Mercury is so amazing.

3. The ability to watch my favorite TV shows online.

4. Being literate. I love to read.

5. Being blessed with enough money to give some away.

6. Singing in my car.

7. Thinking about what is really going on on Lost.

8. The Office.

9. Living in a college town.

10. Living near family.

11. Having Atticus curl up with me to nap, and getting a break from how he spends his waking hours, which is attacking my feet.

12. Revisiting books I love. It's like seeing old friends again.

13. The ability to keep up with real live old friends via Facebook.

14. Florida football.

15. Old family pictures.

16. Fresh flowers.

17. The smell of our Christmas tree.

18. The smell of rain.

19. Living in a subtropical climate.

20. Daydreaming.

25 things

2008-12-28T10:50:00.002-05:00

I saw this on a friend's blog, and since it's Christmas break and I'm just hanging out, I thought I'd put it on mine. Just 25 random things about myself. I'm supposed to tag 25 people, but I can't think of anyone who deserves to be annoyed that much, so I'm skipping that part.

1. I read all four Twilight books, plus the unfinished draft of Midnight Sun, and still can't figure out why I liked them. I mean, I did, I just don't know why.

2. I named my cat after Atticus Finch in To Kill a Mockingbird, because he is the most awesome literary character ever.

3. Kitty Atticus is not much like Book Atticus, though.

4. One of the things I love about my husband is that when I say, "It's possible," he adds, "Pig," and we both know that he's not insulting me, but rather paying homage to one of the greatest movies of all time.

5. My niece and nephew call me Aunt Emily, and I'm just waiting for the day when they watch The Wizard of Oz and start calling me Auntie Em. And by waiting, I mean not looking forward to.

6. The first movie I ever just totally lost it in was Titanic. Full-out hysterics for the entire last hour of the movie.

7. That was definitely not the last movie I ever lost it in, though. Steel Magnolias gave Titanic a run for its money.

8. When my friend Debra and I worked at summer camp together, we told our campers that we were twin sisters. And they bought it, even though we look nothing alike.

9. Sometimes when I grade essays, it's all I can do to not write "WTF?" next to some of their grammar/punctuation/spelling mistakes. Like the paper that claimed that John McCain supported "tickle-down" economics.

10. I take it a little personally when my students skip class. I wonder if my professors ever felt the same way.

11. I could eat at Leonardo's Pizza three times a week and never get tired of it. My body might rebel, though.

12. Sometimes I do eat at Leonardo's Pizza three times a week, and more often than not, I run into my sister there, because she also eats there three times a week. Usually these meetings aren't planned at all - we just have a serious addiction to Leonardo's.

13. I wore a tiara on my wedding day, because seriously, what other day could I get away with that?

14. I also kept my veil on through the whole reception, because when else would I get to wear a veil? That's right, never.

15. My favorite TV show is The Office. I have a mini-crush on Jim. Not John Krasinski. Jim.

16. When I went back to England this summer, six years after my first trip there, one of my top priorities was to eat a scone with clotted cream. That stuff is freaking amazing.

17. I got a huge kick out of English place names while I was there. You know, names like Lower Piddle. And I'm pretty sure I actually saw a town called Lower Piddle.

18. One of my aunts gave another aunt a book called "The Shoes of Salvation" for Christmas. I think I might believe in the Shoes of Salvation.

19. My mom also got a book called "Feng Shoe." I think my family might have an addiction.

20. I do not like Wal-Mart. Not just because of corporate greed run amok, but really because I can't stand the way the aisles feel like they're closing in on me, and the way people bring their two-year-olds there at 11:00 at night so the rest of us have to listen to them screaming.

21. I really can't handle scary movies. I have a hard time with The Others on Lost. Suspense is not really for me.

22. I love Florida football, and I always feel a little star-struck when I see Tim Tebow on campus.

23. Red polish on my toenails always makes me feel good.

24. My freshman year in college, I took a salsa-dancing class.

25. I love the beach.

I love Christmas

2008-12-28T10:14:00.003-05:00

I love all Christmases, but I'd say this one has been pretty high on my list of all-time awesome Christmases. We left Gainesville on the 20th to go to my parents' house in Palm Bay, cats in tow, and got to spend time with Suzanne and Mike, plus my aunt Margaret and uncle Bill from Nebraska, and my aunt Melissa and cousin Wil from Alabama, and both of my grandmothers, and my traveling buddy Debra. I know so many people dread spending extended amounts of time with their families during the holidays, but I seriously think my family is fantastic. I love spending time with them. Everyone gets along, and we all have a good time. I think even my dad, who is a hardcore introvert, has fun, because he can retreat to his music studio when he needs to recharge. On the 23rd, we went with Suzanne, Mike, Debra, Melissa and Wil to the Magic Kingdom, which was part of Wil's Christmas present (he's 13, so spending two days at Disney is still cool for him - hell, I think it would still be cool for me. I love Disney). On Christmas Eve we all ate barbecue, and on Christmas morning we opened presents together, and my amazing husband got me a MacBook! Yay! It is so pretty and user-friendly and I love it. I got him a hiking GPS, so we can go geocaching. He was really excited about it, so I think this is one of our more successful gift-giving Christmases. Now that I have a job, we can actually afford to buy each other something nice.

We came up to Live Oak, FL (about 45 minutes south of the Georgia border) the day after Christmas to see Cary's family, who are also great. We overlapped one night with Cary's brother Jamey and his family, which was just enough time to enjoy each other's company, but not so much time that we all felt cramped together in the house. Yesterday we mostly watched back episodes of Lost - all the seasons are online, and people keep telling us we need to watch them, so we watched one and got totally hooked. Now we're trying to watch all four seasons before season 5 starts at the end of next month. We love it - we watch and watch and watch, and then discuss where we think they really are. At the end of season 1, which is how far we've watched, I think they're in purgatory. But please, no one leave me any comments telling me if I'm right or not. I'd rather watch and learn.

So all in all, great Christmas. We're heading back to Gainesville later this week, and back to real life, but for now, I am going to stay in my pajamas for another hour or so, play with my MacBook, and watch 18 billion episodes of Lost. Then we might geocache. Or just watch more Lost. Or geocache while discussing Lost. I'm really up for anything.

Trips to the vet

2008-12-17T15:34:00.003-05:00

When Cary brought Atticus home two weeks ago, he was too little to get his first round of vaccines - only five weeks old. Since that time, he has been living rather unhappily in our guest bathroom. This wasn't really an ideal situation for anyone - not for Atticus, because he hates being alone, not for George, who couldn't figure out what smelled so much like another cat behind the bathroom door, not for me, who had to clean the bathroom three times a week and listen to Atticus's pitiful mewing when he was locked in there, and not for Cary, who was having visions of himself crawling on his hands and knees into our crying firstborn baby's bedroom to check on him/her, while I wrung my hands in despair in the hallway (this is more or less my reaction to Atticus's crying). He had to live in the bathroom, though, because without vaccines or AIDS/leukemia tests, he and George could have gotten each other sick. So it was a happy day yesterday when I finally took Atticus to the vet to get his first shots.

This cat knows no fear. If he weren't so small, he'd probably be terrifying. He had no problem with being put in the carrier, and spent the whole of the car ride hanging on to the wire grid door, trying to stick his head out to see as much as possible. It didn't bother him that there were dogs in the waiting room at the vet. He was fine with being handed off to the vet techs who gave him his shots, and seemed to be more or less unruffled when they were finished. He did not enjoy his fecal exam, and was sure to let everyone know, but not for a minute did he cower or hide. While we were waiting for the test results, he happily explored the waiting room, charming everyone who came near him. The techs all commented on his feisty personality. When it was time to leave, he cheerfully went back in the carrier, and fell asleep purring on the way home.

Today, I took George, our nine-year-old cat, to get his shots updated. George is a lion of a cat. According to the vet, he weighs 18 pounds, but not because we overfeed him. He's just really, really big. My friend Betty's two-year-old daughter probably weighs about the same as this cat. Maybe less. So there is really nothing that George should be afraid of - he's bigger than any other cat he'll ever meet, barring a tiger or something, and most dogs we know are scared to come near him. Unfortunately, no one has told George this.

To get George into the cat carrier at all, we have to roll him up in a towel like a burrito. This is usually a two-person job - Cary rolls, and I hold the carrier vertically so he can drop George in. Today, I had to do this myself, because Cary was at work. It actually went pretty well - I propped the carrier up against the bedframe, and George was so caught off-guard that he went right in. Then I had to lug him to the car, which was kind of difficult considering the fact that he weighs 18 pounds and was huddled in the back of the carrier, which threw off the balance of the whole thing. When I got him to the vet, it took me and a vet tech to get him out - I pulled his front legs, and she tipped the carrier upside down. Once we got him on the examining table, I had to lean on him and wrap both of my arms around him to keep him from running away. We had to get extra help for the fecal exam. While we were waiting for the doctor, he went back in the carrier, so the doctor had to literally turn the carrier at a 90-degree angle to the floor to get him back out. I leaned on him again while she examined him again, which earned me a waist-to-neck coating of white cat hair on my black shirt. When I brought him home, he deigned to let me pet him for a minute, and then retreated to our bedroom, where he hid under the bed.

Before I introduced these two cats, I was worried that George would be hostile to Atticus - he is, after all, an intruder in George's house. It concerned me that George is so much bigger than Atticus; he could really hurt him if he wanted to. These fears have proven unfounded, as George is more or less indifferent to Atticus, and Atticus spends most of his time trying to show George what a tough guy he is. George will just sit around, looking apathetic, watching Atticus make a fool of himself chasing his tail or something, and will lay perfectly still when Atticus approaches him - doesn't hiss or swat at him, the hair on his back doesn't even stand up. Atticus, on the other hand, approaches George with the look of a guerrilla fighter - slow and stealthy, bristling all over. Then when he gets close enough for George to sniff him - as he inevitably will sniff anything that gets within three inches of his face - Atticus attacks, swatting and spitting for approximately .46 seconds, and then runs off as though none of this was his fault. I saw him actually chase George down the hall yesterday, which was pretty funny, since George probably weighs 10 times as much as Atticus and could easily sit on him and crush him. Poor George doesn't really seem to know what has happened to his life - one minute, he was the king of our new house, and the next, he was being chased by a hissing dust bunny. Right now, Atticus is next to me on the couch, sleeping off the exhaustion of a creature who spends 90% of his waking hours running in circles and attacking feet, and George is in the bedroom, probably reassessing his life. Poor thing. When Cary comes home, he's going to spend some time with him, to reassure him that he hasn't been replaced. All the while, Atticus will be biting his ankles.

Atticus

2008-12-14T23:07:00.007-05:00

Two weeks ago, Cary called me from work to say that he had found a kitten wandering the PK Yonge campus alone. The kitten was obviously way too young to be away from his mama, and there was a freeze warning that night. I could tell that Cary was already pretty set on bringing him home, and we'd been talking about getting another cat to keep George company now that we have a house, so I said to bring him on home. I met them at the vet after work that day, and fell instantly in love. He was so tiny and helpless. I called him Atticus, after my favorite character in one of my favorite books, To Kill a Mockingbird. He was shy and precious. I fed him out of a syringe and off of my finger until he was comfortable enough with canned food to eat by himself.

Two weeks later, the tiny precious kitten has been replaced by a tiny tiger. I am in the unfortunate position of unconditionally loving a little bitty baby who wants to constantly stalk my feet, gnaw on my hands, and claw my face. Atticus is 100% comfortable with Cary and me now, and shows how much he loves us by playing with us the way he would play with other kittens: by biting and scratching us. I'm trying to teach him that this is not appropriate behavior - I put him on the floor and ignore him whenever he bites or scratches - but he is not easily deterred.

I went online to get some advice on how to teach him not to bite and scratch. I got advice like, "Just tap your kitten on the nose when he bites or scratches. This will get his attention and then you can redirect him to something else to play with." I tried that with Atticus, and all it gets him to do is sink his claws into my finger and pull it towards his mouth so he can bite it. I also read, "Gently blow in your kitten's face. This will get his attention and make him stop." So I tried that, and what it does is make Atticus blink a few times, look windblown, and claw at the air. He is a teeny predator who will not be distracted. If he were George's size, he's be absolutely ferocious.

Speaking of George, he is highly offended at the turn of events that has brought him a little brother. Because Atticus was only five weeks old when we found him, he was too little to get vaccinated. Until he's big enough (this Tuesday), we have to keep them separated all the time, which means that when George is in the living room, Atticus is in my bathroom (where he lives most of the time) and when Atticus is in the living room, George is in our bedroom (where he lives most of the time). George is not used to not being out in the house when we're home, and can obviously smell Atticus, even if they haven't interacted yet. Atticus knows George is there, and hangs out around our bedroom door when George is in there, waiting to sprint towards him when one of us opens the door. After Atticus's vaccines on Tuesday, they can officially meet each other, which Atticus seems to be excited about, and George could probably take or leave. I have no idea how this is going to go - I'm kind of hoping that George puts Atticus in his place as far as the scratching and biting goes, but I also want them to get along.

Even with all the hassles (kind of like a small taste of having a baby, I think), I'm glad we have Atticus. He is adorable and he loves us, which I think are the two most important qualities in a pet - an animal that is easy to love and happy to see you. Cats like that are hard to come by. George has been an exception, and so far, it looks like Atticus is too.

The day we brought him home - teeny-tiny!

Hugging his daddy's hand - end of the first week.

Attacking Mama's ear.

Snuggling with Daddy after getting in trouble for biting his face.

End of the semester checklist

2008-12-13T10:08:00.003-05:00

Teaching-related things I did this week:

1. Gave two final exams at the community college.
2. Graded 40+ final exam essays from the community college students.
3. Averaged 40+ community college final grades and posted them online.
4. Gave a two-day final exam in reading/writing class at the ELI.
5. Graded said exam and dealt with an uncomfortable identical-answer situation.
6. Averaged grades for reading/writing class and posted them online.
7. Filled out student evaluations for reading/writing class.
8. Gave a final exam for grammar class at the ELI.
9. Graded said exam.
10. Averaged grades for grammar class and posted them online.
11. Filled out student evaluations for grammar class.
12. Filled out textbook evaluations for reading/writing and grammar classes.
13. Evaluated listening/speaking exit presentations as impartial judge.
14. Proctored exit exam for 92 ELI students. Dealt with mass exodus to bathroom halfway through.
15. Attended ELI commencement. Happiness at students accomplishing something great, frustration at students talking through the whole ceremony and never listening to their classmates making speeches. Irritation that they do this every semester.
16. Attended ELI faculty holiday luncheon at Hillel Center cafe. Ate kosher turkey sub, got Secret Santa gift card to Barnes and Noble.

Non-teaching-related things I did this week:

1. Took Secret Santa gift card to Barnes and Noble, bought sequel to Twilight, and read it in one day. Annoyed by Bella's overall angst and Edward's broodingness, and can't understand why every mythical creature from here to Greece is in love with such an angsty girl, but still totally sucked in.
2. Celebrated Suzanne and Mike's engagement with champagne, and later with bridal magazines.
3. Tried to train Atticus not to scratch and bite while playing. Not successful. Atticus grounded in bathroom.
4. Went to church ladies' tea party/white elephant gift swap. Squealed along with everyone admiring Suzanne's engagement ring. Got rid of ugly windchime, ended up with grill master's tool belt, complete with holder for beer. Do not own grill.
5. Started blog in attempt to not grade papers.

Matron of Honor

2008-12-12T16:33:00.004-05:00

So to end my week of teaching successes and busyness, my sister Suzanne and her boyfriend Mike got engaged yesterday! Yay! So I will be the matron of honor, which I'm really excited about, except for the fact that since I'm married, I have to be the matron of honor, which sounds super-old and not sexy. I feel like I should gain 50 pounds and have some gray hair. But all of that is not that important, because my sister is getting married! She is at my house right now and we're looking at wedding magazines together. Mostly we're just deciding which haute couture dresses are ugly. I'm really excited to help with the wedding planning because I get the fun of planning without the stress of being the bride. Cary wants to help taste-test cake, a job which he says is important for the brother-in-law of the bride. MmmmmMMMM!

Successes in teaching this week

2008-12-11T10:11:00.003-05:00

This is the last week of the semester at the community college and the ELI, and while it's definitely the most stressful time of the semester for me, it definitely has its rewards:

1. One of my community college students (a middle-aged guy returning to college) who was writing F papers at the beginning of the semester got an A on his last essay. He told me that all his grades in all his classes have improved as a result of being in my writing class.

2. Another community college student won a scholarship that I recommended her for. She wrote to say thank you.

3. I was asked to interview for a full-time lecturer position at the ELI. I applied a few weeks ago and thought it was kind of a long shot, since I'm a young teacher, but now I have an interview on January 17.

4. For the final exam at the community college, I asked them to write an essay explaining what grade they think they deserve. A lot of them said in their essays that my class was their favorite. I'm not sure if they were sucking up or not, but it made me feel good :)

5. One of my ELI students baked me cookies for the last day of class. We all watched "The Princess Bride" together and they laughed at the right parts.

These are the reasons I love teaching. It is really hard work, but the rewards are awesome.

Also, I'm in it for the free samples of international food. In the last two years, I've gotten to try all sorts of things I would never have even seen before. Best: Colombian arepas. Worst: actually nothing; most of it's good. Weirdest: Arabian coffee - strange herbal aftertaste. It's not a great reason to get into teaching, but hey, it's an awesome perk.

Why I'm here

2008-12-11T09:19:00.003-05:00

I decided to start a blog because I think it will be fun. The English major in me loves to write, and blogging gives me an easy outlet for that, which I could potentially one day condense, publish, and live happily ever after. I just read "Twilight," and while I thoroughly enjoyed it, one of my parting thoughts was, "Hey, I could do that." I know it's harder than it looks, but I'm pretty sure the hero of my story would do more than look brooding and rescue the same accident-prone girl 15 times in a row.

So here I am, mainly to write for fun. I called the blog "Excuse Me, Teacher" because that's what I hear pretty much all day from the international students I teach. Their languages all have a respectful term for "teacher" that is less high-ranking than "professor," and I can't convince many of them to just call me Emily, so I get called "teacher" a lot. I think it's cute - not really accurate in terms of English usage, but very endearing. My officemate Melina always responds to "Excuse me, teacher" with "Yes, student?" but I just let them go along calling me teacher and counting on some future teacher to tell them not to. It's just too sweet.

So in this blog, I plan to share some of the adventures I have in teaching and also in the rest of my life. Anybody who's reading this pretty much knows me, so I don't have to introduce myself and say where I live, how old I am, etc. - actually, it's probably not a good idea to put that stuff on the internet anyway. As far as teaching goes, I teach English composition to college freshmen at the local community college, and English language skills to international students at our university's English Language Institute. I really enjoy both of my jobs, but teaching international students is really where my heart is - I love to make them feel welcome and comfortable in the US, and I love learning about their cultures. I love sharing the joys and wonders of the English language, which, as a native speaker, I think are plentiful. For example, I think it is absolutely brilliant of Southerners to invent "y'all." English is lacking a second person plural (i.e. the plural of "you," which plenty of other languages have), so Southerners, in our great wisdom, came up with one: "y'all." I think this completely disproves the "Southerners are slow" theory that so many people from up North seem to cling to, and makes our language more interesting. So as a proud Southerner, I teach it to my international students on the first day of class. Joy #1 of English.